As promised, I sat down to that televised equivalent of a bag of cheese puffs known as Dancing with the Stars and let me just say I was blown away! Yes it's still a hokey, bloated train wreck but the contestants were very entertaining.
My beloved Kim Kardashian looked stunning even though she danced rather poorly. She kept wondering why she was so unbalanced. Hmm, Kimmy. It could have anything to do with that enormous booty, could it? Anywho, the whole clan was there cheering her on and I hope she stays around.
Susan Lucci, on the other hand, was a total disappointment as she moved like the world's skinniest android. La Lucci, we love you but you need to visit In-N-Out while your in Los Angeles. Daily. Olympic volleyballer Misty May was also a letdown. I'm used to athletes dominating on this show but she kind of looked like stallion in a ball gown and danced like one too.
My favorite performance of the night was that of Miss Cloris Leechman. Being 82 did not slow her down! She's still fiesty and hilarious. Sure, she's not gonna win the damn disco ball trophy but she will provide entertainment while she's around. In her first night, she sat on the judges laps, zinged one-liners, and jokingly blurted obscenities when she received her scores. Also, it should be noted that her body is AMAZING for an old gal. I've always loved her in things like The Mary Tyler Moore Show and Young Frankenstein so I'm not surprised she's just as funny in real life.
In addition to Leechman, there's the "will Toni Braxton collapse?" factor, the Lacey from So You Think You Can Dance joining the cast as one of the pros, and the return of yummy Maks!
And just like that: I'm hooked. I always say to myself "Maybe I'll skip it this year". 5 million sequins and ten has-beens later, I'm mesmerized and on board for the entire season.